I agree to an interview, and I get grilled

Sprint McDowell wants to do a blog post in which he interviews me, and I told him no way. He threatened to do an unauthorized interview. I don’t know how that works, but to make sure I’m accurately portrayed, I agree.

You may remember Sprint from a previous post. He hosts the on-line, real-time, cyber game show Race to Win.SONY DSC

Sprint will be asking his on-line questions from his studio in Los Angeles, and I’ll reply from my home here in Spokane. Screen shots are added as the interview progresses, so let’s get started.

Jim: “Sprint, I want a clean, friendly interview. No twisting of facts or manufactured controversies.”

Sprint: “Listen, I dictate the terms. Those evasive, roundabout, circular replies Interview instructionsthat you’re famous for – forget it.”Interview fright

Jim: “Sure, Sprint. Sorry.”

Sprint: “Why are you so dumb?”

Jim: “I’m not dumb.”

Sprint: “Wrong! Didn’t you post a couple lurid photos of yourself on this blog that revealed way, way too much?

Jim: “I’ve done many posts and photos, so I’ll have to form a committee to look into that.”

Sprint: “I Must Run Everywhere is a one-man operation, Jim. Answer the question!”

Jim: “It is a one-man operation, but I wish I had a collaborator. Sometimes two heads are better than one.”

Sprint: “What did I say about evasive answers?”

Jim: “Something about roundabouts and circular saws?”

Sprint: “I see I’m not going to get anywhere with this, you foolish man. Next, a simple question for a simple mind. Who takes your photos?”

Jim: “Almost always me.”

Sprint: “How can you take photos while being in them?”

Jim: “I use the timer on my camera. Sometimes I have to take a lot of shots, especially on action photos to get a usable one.”Interview chat

Sprint: “Look at me, not at the ceiling, Jim. Who plays Ruby Redpepper, and is the picture below photoshopped?”tricia at airportJim: “My daughter Tricia is Ruby Redpepper. She really did get on that plane. I ask her to be in photos or take photos for blog ideas whenever she visits.”

Sprint: “Does she really own Animal Fulfillment Specialists and hired you to assist her on an outing involving just you two and President Obama?”

Jim: “Maybe….not. Actually she’s program director for the President’s Export Council at the Department of Commerce in DC. That’s what made the photos for that post possible. Take a look at the photo she posted on Facebook a few months ago. I thought her comment, “Creepin’ on the Prez”, was funny.Tricia creepin'

Sprint: ” Enough, Jim. Do not use my interview to boast about your daughter! You are such a braggart.”Interview incredulity

Jim: “Listen to me, Sprint. My daughter is the second-most wonderful, special and incredibly talented person in the entire world.”

Sprint: “I’ve had enough. This interview is over. Wait…your daughter is second in the world? Who’s first? Hold on, don’t answer. Jim, don’t post that photo!”

ME!wedding race winner

Running adventure turns bloody

When you run in a new place or setting, does the novelty add some spark to your running like it does for me?

We’ve had a stretch of warm, sunny weather in Spokane, so I made plans to drive to a new place where I’d never been.SONY DSC

Driving north from Spokane, you see fewer stores, homes, and farms. It’s not long before the road ends. I parked and after a couple miles of running on a trail, it ended too. I was in uncharted territory.

It doesn’t take that long to reach this area where civilization has yet to be established. It’s a large, unexplored area, and using a map is no help. They all have a big blank area with the phrase, ‘Yet to be explored or mapped.’

It’s neat having unexplored frontier so close to town. There are rumors of undiscovered animal species, and some people say a remnant population of dinosaurs exist. I consider it a bunch of hootenanny.

I hadn’t run long before I started hearing an occasional loud roar in the distance. I was startled by a huge, airplane-size, flying creature that glided across my path just ahead.

A couple times the sound of a large predator attacking prey that viciously fought back echoed through the valley. Hmmm…….maybe there’s more to this area than I thought.

Twice I came to piles of excrement that were as tall as me. The animal that did it must be huge. Then I came to an unsettling scene. It appeared a solitary hiker had been devoured, and parts of limbs lay scattered about.SONY DSC

Disturbing as the scene was, I pushed on because I wanted to get in more mileage.

I came to a clearing and whoa! I startled a large animal feeding on carrion. It looked like a saber-tooth tiger, an extinct animal. It sprinted to me and attacked.

I desperately fought back with all I had, and for some reason, the creature broke off the attack and ran off.

I was unscathed except one of my fingers really hurt. It wasn’t hard to tell why. The creature had bitten it off.

Lucky for me, I found the bloody, missing digit on the ground. I grabbed it and ran at a really fast pace back to my car. I put my finger in a small box I had in the trunk of my car, hoping doctors could reattach it.SONY DSC

Arriving home, I was too stressed-out to attend to my injury. I put my finger in the frig, fixed a bowl of my favorite comfort food, and watched Seinfeld re-runs. SONY DSC

My visit to the hospital will have to wait until tomorrow.

Running group has issues

Last Thursday I checked out this running group I’d heard about. Someone told me it was their first run of the season.

So I get there, and parking’s a hassle. I had to park so far away that I got in major mileage just running from my car to the meeting spot.

Hassle number two – the room is so packed I had to shove, push and throw people aside to get in. It’s a big banquet room, and there are more than 500 people inside.FI7

This is not a running group. It’s aerobic overpopulation.

So, some people get on the stage, and I guess it’s the group’s board and this dude starts talking, and check out the coat he’s wearing. What’s the deal with that? What is our world coming to?FI 4

I do the run, and it’s three miles which is okay, but the post-run party – boy are there issues. Look at the line for beer.FI6 I expect a short wait at most, not an overnight stay. I paid a guy $10 to be a line placeholder and went for some free cake.

It was pretty nice chowing down cake while checking out the tall lovely standing nearby with her hands on her hips.FI 12

My eyes couldn’t get enough, and before I knew it, I’d downed more than a dozen pieces while staring at her.

So here’s another issue – the dude with the crazy coat comes over and gives me the crook eye as if I alone am putting the group’s cake budget into the red.FI5

He hangs around monitoring me, so I decide to check the status of my beer order.

The guy I paid is nowhere to be found. Eventually I find out he got through the line in about two minutes because the servers are really fast, and my beer’s been sitting on a table for over half an hour. This brings me to the next issue.

I take a drink, and it’s warm. How can any respectable business get away with serving warm beer? This running group sucks!

Things eventually got better. I met the DJ, who’s a member of the club, and a pleasant guy to talk to.FI9

He’s the only DJ I know who joins the crowd on the dance floor and grooves to his own music.

In an adjacent room I chatted with this friendly group. I whined and complained about their running club, but they laughed and told me to stop joking around.FI 2

I met a couple attractive women who were attending their first run. With club members like this, I’m very motivated to attend future runs.FI8I think with this group I’ve found my ultimate dream come true – flirting with pretty women while gobbling down free cake.

Finally, I admit that I’m not really a first timer. I’ve been going to Flying Irish runs for several years, and I joke when I say the group sucks. It’s a great social event, and I’ve become friends with a lot of wonderful people. I look forward to Thursday evenings.

And because I’m such a super member, in my own mind, I celebrate by attending runs wearing a cape.FI 11

Top Marathon Countries

What country’s runners have set the most world records in the marathon? The top two have nineteen and eighteen, respectively. The third place country has eight. If you can guess these three countries, you are a true student of marathoning.

I did the two-hour drive to Washington State University in Pullman and got a day pass to the Library of Academic and Scholarly Research. I wanted the most reliable and accurate sources for compiling my list.marathon investigator

I spent several hours conducting research and as I left, I chatted with a librarian and mentioned the work I’d done. She told me I didn’t need to go to a library because that sort of info is easy to get on the internet.

Many times I’ve presented myself awards for outstanding achievement. However, this move was noteworthy for the opposite reason. I could have sat at my home computer to do this. Since I recognize and promote myself when I do something well, I figured it’s only fair that I do the same when I’m not outstanding, so I put on a dunce cap and restricted myself to the corner for one hour.Marathon dunce

Okay, now the results. Nine countries had a runner set a world record once, so for brevity, I list only countries with multiple world record performances.

*             Men                                      Women                              Combined

  • United Kingdom – 12            United States – 12                 United States – 19
  • Japan – 7                              Norway – 6                            United Kingdom – 18
  • United States – 7                  United Kingdom – 6               Japan – 8
  • Ethiopia – 5                           West Germany – 5                Kenya – 7
  • Kenya – 4                              France – 3                             Norway – 6
  • Australia – 3                          Kenya – 3                              Ethiopia – 5
  • Sweden – 2                                  *                                      France – 3

You may wonder why African countries aren’t in the top three since the last six men’s world records have been set by either a Kenyan or Ethiopian runner. This is because their successes have occurred in recent years whereas the U.S. and British runners set many of their records in the early days of marathoning.

If you’d like to check out the details, you can read about the marathon world record progression on Wikipedia by clicking here.

Sexual objectification III

Running topics are once again taking a back seat as my mentor directs me to write about my experiences as I’m prepared for a future role. This is a continuation of the previous post in which I turned getting dressed in the morning into a show for the woman who lived in the apartment next door.

The woman who took over the lease next door to me was every bit as pretty as the woman who’d just moved out. Tall and thin with black hair, she was in her early 20’s. I found her very attractive.

She was a co-worker at an insurance agency with the former tenant, and she had visited her once before when I did my thing in front of the window. However, when she moved in, she put up a wall screen that covered most of her window. My interpretation was that she wasn’t interested in my morning shows.

In addition, another woman in her mid-30’s often came over first thing in the morning. I later learned she was yet another co-worker at the insurance agency. So attractive was she also. I really liked having such beautiful women right next door. However, I thought she was there to provide support to her friend and co-worker, and possibly to dissuade me from doing my thing.

It was surprising that mentor did not push me to disrobe while the two were there. I noticed small signs that I was misinterpreting, but being the cautious person I am, I didn’t act on it.

One afternoon I was at my window when my attractive neighbor came outside and went to her car to get something. It appeared this was a ruse because the way she carried herself, and her self-awareness told me she’d noticed me inside my place and knew I was now watching her. It was time.

Somehow, I immediately got up over this, and loosening my belt, I returned to window view fully dressed save a flag pole rising well above my pant’s waistline.

In no time she came out the door again and did the same as before. I interpreted this (correctly), as an invitation to resume my morning shows.

As before, I so enjoyed disrobing and presenting myself in various ways while the flag pole was up. Another idea mentor provided was to use a hole that I had cut in my pant’s pocket and use it as an exit point.

Though I couldn’t see through my neighbor’s sheer curtain, at times while performing close to my window, as I kept myself shielded from being seen by anyone else, she often strolled slowly past another, uncovered window. Oh, I liked it when she did that.

Like the previous tenant, she had a guy, and he worked out of town often. Though I chatted with my pretty neighbor on occasion, like before, it was typical neighbor-chat, and there was never any discussion of, or interaction beyond our morning ritual.

Also like before, as time went on, mentor pushed me to take more risks. There was an occasional evening try, but when her guy came home as I was about to disrobe one evening, mentor allowed me to abandon that idea.

One morning, mentor suggested my neighbor was usually up well before my regular start time, and I should do something special. I did not want to do this, but as always, I was compelled.

I opened the curtains in my dining area which faced my neighbor’s kitchen, and with the sun still not up, I was well-illuminated as I prepared to climb atop the dining table and stand on my knees without a stitch of clothing, flag-pole up, to dust the light fixture.

As I was atop the table, taking my time to get every speck of dust, my neighbor’s grandfather walked into view in the breezeway between our places. His eyes wavered slightly as if he’d seen me peripherally and wanted to look directly. I don’t know how much he saw, but I immediately climbed down and went into damage control.

My neighbor’s grandfather came over occasionally to check on her, and I’d talked to him on a previous visit. He was likeable, and I’d told him I’d watch out for her. As you can see, I did more than watch out for her.

The grandfather left, and later that morning as I took out the garbage, I unexpectedly ran into my neighbor. I figured she’d been watching and saw the whole thing, so I wanted to apologize for trying such a stunt. However, when I said I was sorry for this morning’s near disaster, she looked perplexed. Turns out she saw nothing. She had slept late.

I quickly changed my tune, making up a story about a friend who had stopped by and then drove recklessly as he left, jumping the curb in front of her apartment.

As the next few days passed, no one knocked on my door or confronted me about what happened. Apparently I dodged a bullet again.

This wasn’t the only incident in which I was caught in the window. In each case, instead of being allowed to do the sensible thing and refraining, mentor again compelled me to continue the show the next morning as if nothing had happened. I know this caused some grief to my neighbor.

After a few months, her lease was up and she moved out. An elderly couple from Kentucky moved into the apartment, and they often brought over a slice of freshly baked homemade pie that was very delicious.

Enough time has passed that it’s apparent I escaped mostly unscathed, as far as know, and up to now. I feel an attachment to the women next door because I saw traits in them that I admired, and despite my behavior, I think they’d still say I’m an okay guy. Though we were separated by two windows and several feet of concrete, there was an intimacy in our morning ritual, and I wished there was a way I could have talked to them more often.

If you missed an earlier, much shorter post, My Daily Stress, I explain why I must do these things and who mentor is.


Sexual objectification II

This is a continuation of the previous post which has nothing to do with running. My mentor has instructed me to use this platform to tell about my experiences as I’m prepared for a future role.

In the last post I wrote about undressing in front of a window in my living room so that I could be seen by a young, attractive woman who lived in the next-door apartment. I didn’t think it wise to do this, but mentor easily compels me to do things against my will.

This undressing quickly changed from just changing my clothes to putting on a show. Sometimes I was completely without clothes, other times I wore loose pants that I allowed to slowly slip down. I often did trivial tasks like watering houseplants or dusting and then interrupt my work by swinging back and forth, presenting myself with a side view, or just standing to allow my neighbor to witness the hands-off, full stage of growth from relaxed to not relaxed.

Sometimes while completely undressed, I pressed my body against the window. Often I’d stand close to the window and move my hips back and forth, mimicking a pendulum-like musical timing device called a metronome, pictured below.

Metronome photo by Vincent Quach.

Photo by Vincent Quach.

Along the way, my neighbor gave me signs that she liked my daily show even though I couldn’t see her because of the sheer curtain covering her window. My reluctance when I started doing this turned into enjoyment. It was exciting, and at times it hit me how wonderful it felt to be parading around naked and doing all these things as a woman willingly watched. The term “sexual object” is usually applied to women and can have a negative connotation. For a man, however, it’s very gratifying. A couple times, after especially erotic “performances”, my pretty neighbor came outside and waved good-by to me as I left for work. It melted my heart when she did this.

However, our occasional, passing conversations were of the typical, neighborly type. There was quite an age difference between us, and in addition, she was tight with her boyfriend. This put a damper on any talk of what was going on, or of anything happening outside of my morning activities.

As the weeks passed, I became less enthused to continue. It seemed to me it was becoming old hat for my neighbor. However, mentor pushed me to continue and take increasing risks. I started disrobing after coming home from evenings out which I was in no mood to do. It was also very risky because the boyfriend was there. A bunch of times I was forced to do these evening performances, and I’m so lucky I was not seen by anyone but her, as far as I know.

Also, whenever I stood close to the window, I was visible to several residences. I always monitored the outside environment when I did this, but someone could be looking out their window, and it might be hard for me to notice. One morning this happened, and I noticed too late.

In a residence across the street, two women were watching and they retreated when they saw me look their way. I immediately stopped my performance and made sure I couldn’t be seen by them. However, a short time later, a vehicle pulled up in front of my neighbor’s apartment.

The guy eyed my place before getting out and knocking on my neighbor’s door. She stepped outside and they talked for a few minutes. She had an expression of deep concern the entire time. She did not smile or appear at ease. Was this guy a plainclothes policeman?

He did most of the talking, and it appeared she was giving short responses to whatever he was asking. In the end, he returned to his vehicle and drove away.

I’ve written before that it’s my nature to be cautious. After something like this, of course I’d cool it. But the next morning I was back at it, directed to do so by my unrelenting mentor.

Eventually the boyfriend got an out-of-state job and the woman next door moved away. With all the risk-taking I did, I’m so thankful there weren’t any big negative incidents. Involving my neighbor also put her at risk, but I’m so grateful for her divine attention and her care in keeping our arrangement under wraps.

I thought my days as a performer were over. However, the next tenant in the empty unit next to me was another tall, young, single woman. My next post will describe what happened as my performing career unexpectedly continued.

For readers who wonder why I am doing these things, and who “mentor” is, it can be found in a previous, much shorter post, My Daily Stress.

Sexual objectification I

I’m called upon once again by my discarnate mentor to write about experiences as I am prepared for a future role, so another vacation from running topics.

As I’ve mentioned before, I must do many things that I would not choose on my own. Often there is a sexual aspect to this. I’ve written previously about a sexual fantasy in which I disrobed as a young, attractive woman watched and how it became almost 100% accurately manifested in reality fairly recently.

In this case, a tall, young woman with bouncy blonde hair moved into the unit next door and had a good view into my “apartment”. I was working outside one day and she came up to me and introduced herself. She was friendly and out-going.

Not long after this, as I got dressed one morning, mentor instructed me to do so in front of the window. I did not think this was a wise idea, nor did I the next morning when I was told to do so again. However, both mornings I stripped off everything I had on and then quickly put my clothes on. Because of a sheer curtain on her window that allowed her to see into my place, but prevented me from seeing in, I did not know if she saw.

I was given a break for a few days, and one morning after returning from a run, I dawdled getting into the shower. Without any input from mentor, I happened to notice signs that the woman next door and a visiting friend were monitoring me, expecting that I’d be changing.

I was grateful this happened because of the risk I’d taken. It told me that my undressing had been noticed and without any apparent negative reaction which was hugely important because the following week I would be sent to the window again and do more than just change my clothes.

For a few months, nearly every morning before my work day, I “performed” in front of the window. Knowing that I had a receptive audience, and receiving small signs along the way signaling approval, I came to enjoy doing this.

However, mentor pushed me to do things that involved greater risk, and it turned out that others caught glimpses of my performances. In the next post, I will continue with this topic. For readers who haven’t read a previous post, My Daily Stress, I explain why I must do these things.