Most runners like to push themselves to get a good time or finish well. Very few choose to meander at a really, really, slow pace. It’s boring, and it takes a long time. If you’re in a race, finishing after the finish line fixtures have been taken down and nobody’s around is not appealing. Running extremely slow may appear comical to others. And if it’s cold, you can’t generate enough body heat to stay warm.
I’ve been exploring the nooks, crannies, and pits of being a slow runner, and I’m not even intentional about it. An unavoidable consequence of aging, I keep hoping I can overcome it and still be kinda fast, sometimes.
Some days, not only do I run slow, I have a hard time just running. There’s no injury, pain or fatigue from a recent workout. My age has caused my body to sometimes have a negative reaction to running. Almost always I do a warm-up before a running group run. Despite my very slow warm-up pace, the resistance can be so great, and I feel so lousy, I have to walk, hoping the break will help me feel better. This can happen multiple times during my warm-up. It’s especially bad on morning runs as I’m not a morning person.
Even after my warm-up, it’s not unusual during the group run for me to see someone running really slow, and it really strikes me how slow they’re going, yet they’re ahead of me and pulling away. It’s demoralizing.
Yet sometimes I can run at a decent pace for someone who’s 66 years old. This brings me hope my running can stay satisfying enough that I’ll continue to run. However, there have been times I felt so lousy that If it became the norm, I’d give up or drastically reduce my running.
On the plus side, I realized I’ve done enough slow running that I’ve become well-qualified to teach runners who want to learn how to run really slow. This has turned into a neat opportunity, and for the past several months I’ve been working on the most effective methods for teaching this skill. Now I’m ready to offer instruction.
If you’d like to enter my program, you’ll find there’s much more to running very slow than you’d imagined. Becoming proficient may cause you to happily dedicate yourself to lifelong slow running. However, after joining my program, you’ll be asked to work on a couple mental barriers that must be overcome. These are non-negotiable requirements:
- An attitude often used when doing a job or task – I’m making good progress must be eliminated from your mindset and replaced with It’s hard to tell if I’m making any progress.
- Doing something with the idea that it won’t take long must change to This is going to take a long, long time.
My program involves both in-class study and field work. Analyzing video is key. Below is one sample that both inspires participants and shows what’s possible by the end of the program.
I contacted Washington State University, submitted my curriculum, and it has been accepted, and my course is certified. It will be offered at the WSU Spokane campus beginning next semester. For those of you interested in learning how to run really, really slow, I look forward to seeing you soon.
Sign me up Jim! As usual, you are a man ahead of his time. You will be a tenured professor in no time. Through age and misfortune, I have been able to slow my pace substantially in the past few years but my technique really needs work. You have a gazelle like spring in your step and you are actually smiling! When I run slow, my feet are barely dragging over the surface and I have this painful expression on my face. Four years ago at mile 20 of a marathon, I passed two women out for a Sunday morning walk. Being a polite old man, I wished them a good morning. I overheard one tell the other, “at least he’s smiling”. I turned to inform them it was a grimace! I could use some spring in my stride and a smile instead of a grimace. Let me know when classed begin!
Don, you’re mistaken saying I’m a man ahead of his time. I’m way behind what my time used to be – and everyone else’s as well. Thanks for the compliment about having a springy, gazelle-like gait, but to attract students to my class, there was a little acting going on there. The description of your running form is something I can relate to. Adding to that, I sometimes breathe really hard and loud even when I’m running super slow. The sound does not fit the level of exertion. I should be breathing like that only when I’m trying to pass people while running up a very long, steep hill. I will register you in my class, Don, and designate you the teacher’s pet. No need to take notes or hand in assignments, and you can talk all you want with the girls sitting nearby.
I’m really slow to take up running again. It’s taken me years to get this far.
I believe you’ll be an ideal student and find immediate success.
You are so far behind you are in front! Thank you for keeping us smiling and moving forward my friend. 🐢💚✅
Thank-you for the compliment, Loco, and your comment about being so far behind I’m in front. When friends ask how I did at the race, I can tell them that when I finished, no one was close to me.